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Reflections
Reflections
FROM: Susanne D. (Suzq2u2) … posted (2) Years Ago, Circa 2017
Isn’t it interesting how our perspectives shift when smoking is not an option. Not just as individuals but also our perspectives about others in the thralls of addiction.
I took my friend to Glenrose Rehab the other day to support her. While she was busy with Dr’s etc I had time to kill and I noticed insanity in motion. I can recognize it because I live with the insanity too; there is no judgement, just a deep sadness. I saw myself in them.
The sadness & empathy stems from watching folk with missing limbs, some were on oxygen, some were in wheelchairs, others were living with mental health issues and multiple chronic & acute physical diseases. All these folks were seeking help for their health...oh the irony of it all eh!
I was watching them all frantically hauling on their cigarettes outside. Not one looked like they were enjoying the smoke. They looked embarrassed at times; the social stigma and judgement had peeled away their self respect & worth...the heavy cost of smoking...still they lit up another.
It stunk out there...almost nauseating. Butts littered the area; obviously there was no consideration for others or acknowledgment that this was a no smoking zone. Coughing, hacking up a lung and spitting gobs of phlegm and breathlessness were just a fact of their daily living experience. They were visibly stressed and anxious, their skin was grey, almost opaque.
God it is so sad that this addiction holds them hostage as if they have no choice and a slow death is preferable & accepted as their fate.
This was me...I saw me...hopeless, helpless and desperate for relief from suffering and pain. I too believed smoking relieved my stress and anxiety; the risk was worth it.
Today I am grateful for this experience. I am grateful that I understand and fully accept that smoking is no longer an option for me. I am grateful that mind, body and spirit can heal. As I write and share this I recognize a cathartic moment; it feels good to release it.
I hope my rambling has not bothered anyone here. If it can create a light bulb moment for someone then it is worth the vulnerability I feel.
KMQ DFS and NOPE is where it is at for me.